The Ranting Jenny

I've become that girl. The coffee sippin', watch the news before work, one hour commute, laptop case slung over my shoulder workin' gal. My part-time job has literally taken over my life.

I hate it.

The work that I do has nothing to with what my $16,000 in loans has paid for the past five years. This is the least intellectually stimulating time of my life and it sucks hard. If I'm gonna kiss someone's ass I would much rather it be a professor than any of these lowly bastards in the tech industry that wear those stupid retractable badges that hang from their belt loops. At least a professor has done some good in their life: taught. I really loved the hospitality industry before I got promoted. I wasn't able to see what was really happening behinds the scenes within the management team. Unconventional practices of discipline? If I wanted to be treated like a five year old I would have never moved out of my parent's house.

Anyway, I wish I were in still in college. Booze it up whenever I wanted, pull-off all-nighters, biking to school, traveling with friends. Everything used to be so damn peachy. I used to be able to grab a coffee while waiting for my next class, have endless conversations with my roommates about boys...everything. Now, I brew my own coffee before I go to work, eat lunch AT WORK and talk to my Chef boyfriend about us. Nothing wrong with all of that, but my lifestyle has changed so much in comparison to where I was at exactly a year ago. My life now is so damn...routine.

I was caught-up in things that actually mattered to me. Being a contributing writer to the Vagina Monologues, interning to raise visibility of minority women, researching the colonization of the Philippine education system and then finally coming to a realization that I don't really need to associate myself with the Filipino community. I got my first A+ at CAL in a business class. I really found who I was and how much potential I have in life. I've said this before and I'll say it again, but my job only contributes to my financial capital. I need something to stimulate my human capital. It's such a shame that our culture emphasizes on higher education so much, yet it isn't affordable to the masses and for those who actually have access to it become robots in their careers anyway. We've lost sight of what was important once someone has completed college.

Essentially, whoever you are and whatever walk of life you come from, there's a glass ceiling just waiting for you. You know how when you're a child you just can't wait to draw on the window in the car on a cold day. For a lot of us, that's exactly what we're doing-- we wait to draw what we want on that window and little do we realize, we're just drawing. We're drawing paths for our lives that we cannot accomplish because, fuck, people won't let us. And, believe me, I'm the type of person who's all about dreams...it's just damn impossible to go about this world where meritocracy is nothing. Can you believe that? Meritocracy doesn't mean anything nowadays. It's all about who you know, not what you know. Take a dose of your own medicine, America. What the hell happened to what you know?!?


And, that is the Jenny rant for the day. That's what I think about while seating snobs who are about to have a business meeting over lunch.

YouTube it: "Little Boxes, Weeds"

That's how I feel about life.